Thursday 24 June 2010

podcast number 3

Thursday 17 June 2010

World Cup Day 7 Review

Today we hailed in a new age for the 2010 FIFA World Cup. Today we saw three, yes three, very, very exciting games. Unbelieveable stuff. Not only were they exciting, but they were choc full of goals an all. Goodness me.

We started the day with a potential classic. The team with everything to prove; Argentina, against a reletivley good side; South Korea. Argentina started brightly, with that unknown character who seems to pop up everywhere Lionel Messi making the majority of the runs, chances and plays for the Argies. Korea managed to hold firm until the 16th minute, before an administrative error lead to Park Chu-Young scoring an own goal. And then Argentina decided to score goals. Real Madrid "star" Gonzalo Higuain knocked one in after 33 minutes, and then it looked over. It really did. South Korea made little chances, and little attempt to score. But they did. A shocking defensive error led to Lee Chung-Yong latched onto a diabolical pass back to the 'keeper, and forced it past said 'keeper instantly.
Yet Maradona remained upbeat going in at half time, and Argentina came out fighting, yet failed to make their dominance show, and remained at 2-1. And then it got interesting. South Korea fought back. Yeom Ki-Hun wasted the chance of the match, hoofing the ball wide with his weaker left foot. And thats when you realised that Argentina were going to win. Higuain dropped in again after 76 minutes, and finished the match as contest to make it 3-1. It was then put right to bed after that man Higuain slotted home 4 minutes later. Game over.
For long periods of the game, it was bloody exciting. But, for the first time in this tournament, we saw a real contender for the trophy. Apart from Germany, obviously.

The second match was the other Group B match, between the two losers of yesterweek; greece and Nigeria. It was really, really shit for about 16 minutes, before Nigeria broke through with a free kick that was just so poorly defended it was unbelieveable. Uche swung the ball in, and the Greek keeper dived completly the wrong way as it drifted into the net. And Nigeria really started to show dominance until Kaita got sent off, and began to leak some form of urine from his eyes on the way down the tunnel. Celtic "megastar" Samaras came on, and Greece began to attack for the first time since the 2004 European Championships. And they scored, by God. They did. Salpingidis had a shot, but it took a bigger deflection than the Forlan goal of yesterday. And like the momentum of the match, the ball swung in Greece's favour.
The second half brought end to end football, with Nigeria having several chances, as did Greece (hence end to end football). Greece had a shot that was so poorly defended it led to a counter attack chance for Nigeria. But they gave it to some moron who tried to direct it into an open goal with his studs. It didn't go in. After 72 minutes, Greece found a second goal out of nowhere. The Nigerian keeper did a Rob Green, and dropped the ball. Except this time it went to Torosidis, who scored a huge goal for the Greeks. After more chances for both sides, the match ended, and Greece notched up their very first world cup win ever. Happy days. Unfortunatly, it looks like Nigeria are on their way out, despite playing some good football over the last two games. But thats what you get when you can't score.

The final game of today was the last of Group A; France against Mexico. The match was a scrappy show in the first half, with very little chances to either team. But Mexico played some really nice attacking football, and at the end of the day, thats all that matters.
The second half was much better. Again, Mexico had the best chances, and were rewarded for their dominance, when new Manchester United forward Javier Hernandez ran from an onside position, took the ball round Hugo Lloris and slotted the ball into an empty net. France were visibly stunned, because they had all the excitment shocked out of them. Mexico had another attck, and they earned a penalty, which 58 year old forward Blanco smashed home, and ended the match, pretty much. And it did end, and Mexico were overjoyed.
The thing about this result was that when Uruguay face Mexico, a point will see both sides through. Which is a bit shit, bacause they'll both play for the draw. Which is a bit shit.

Anyway, BEST DAY IN AGES in terms of football. It was exciting stuff, and we all want to see is this stuff continue. Thursday Friday happy days? Lets hope so!

Wednesday 16 June 2010

World Cup Day 6 Review

Well, todays the day! Todays the day we finally wave goodbye to the shite we've been force fed over the last 6 days. And all the better for it. But first, ther is one more group to go, and that group has one team we all must fear. But before we were introduced to Spain, we had another game to get through.

The first match of group H was a tie between Honduras and Adams pick for a surprise; Chile. The Chilans began the tie on the front foot, with open attack play. Real Madrid target Sanchez scuffed a couple of chances, before the unknown Beausejour slotted home after 34 minutes. Honduras did little to change the score line, and the gulf in class (many of the Hondurans were part timers), and were lucky to go in at half time with the score at 1-0.
The second half started as bright as the first, with Chile showing off some wonderful attacking football. Often there would be four or five players in space for the playmaker to slot the ball into. Chile were blessed with an open goal opportunity, yet headed the ball straight into the floor.
The match ended with the score at 1-0, but it could've been two or three. Chile has given us much food for thought, and could be a surprise contender for winning this group.

The second was European champions Spain against the country the won it in; Switzerland. Spain played the same pass and move football we saw from Chile, and to an extent, Barcelona. Yet Switzerland managed to defend the stronghold, and came out of each attack unscathed, and made Spain wallow in comparison. And somehow they were on level terms at half time.
Switzerland started the second half better than they ended the first, making at least some attempt to score a goal. And, against the run of play, odds and likelyhood, they did. Fernandes latched onto and wonderful through ball, took it past the unessesserally outspoken Casillas (WHOS LAUGHING NOW YOU SPANISH TOSS?), and tried to pass the sponge ball into the net. It stopped halfway there. He the proceeded to kick Barcelona centre back Pique in the face, and slotted from 2 yards. The Swiss 1, Pedros 0.
Xabi Alonso struck the bar from 25 yards, and Fernando Torres did little to change the scoreline. But it was Switzerland who came the closest to scoring the second of the game. Derdiyok battled through three defenders before slicing his right boot through the ball, leading it onto the post. The ball twizzled out, and Switzerland had a flurry of chances, but the time had gone. The match ended, though, and Switzerland topped group H at the end of the day.

The final match saw the return of hosts and that team thay Sky Sports always seems to be interviewing residents of, South Africa, who faced Uruguay. Both teams hadn't played since the first day, and Uruguay were yet to play a memorable game this tournament. The game started with the same pace as the last South African game, with Uruguay more likely to score. And the duely lived up to their billing, after 24 minutes, when Diego Forlan struck from 25 yards, and the ball took a deflection midflight. South Africa gave real football ago, but Tshabalaba wanted to hit the ball without taking a touch. Pretoria was subdued, and the whistle put an end to what was quite a boring first half.
the second half brought more boring football, and, honestly, nothing happened til about the 80th minute, where Khune fell over,and Suarez took the ball round him, and fell over. The ref bought it, and the keeper was sent off. Forlan blasted the penalty in the top left, and any chance of an uprsing was quashed. This was drilled home when Uruguay finished after 95 minutes thanks to Pereira, and then the whistle blew. Game over.

Day six brought the best football of the tournament so far. But now there's plenty to play for, we might get some exciting football. Because thats what we all want.

Keep following the blog, as I would imagine I can get Adam writing again, follow the twitter @WorldCupWillie1, follow me @Willo290592, and download our podcast, which is on iTunes.
Keep on trucking.

World Cup: Half time report... Well, nearly.

One game over for each of the 32 sides in World Cup 2010. We've had (a few) goals, ball complaints, surprises, shocks, outrage but mostly disappointment. So, how are each of the big names doing after just 90 minutes?

France
On the opening day of the tournament, 2006 runner's up France were held to a goalless draw by ten-man Uruguay. Once more, the group should get harder from here on in; the well-organised Mexico are next on the French fixture list, followed by the hosts, South Africa. France should on paper qualify, where they'd most likely face Argentina or South Korea. Excluding star player, Bayern Munich's Frank Ribery, France lack players who can provide ammunition to target man Anelka, and many of the players stepping up to the mark aren't as accomplished as their predecessors. Only a brave man would back France all the way: 2010 doesn't look like their year.

South Africa
After netting a fantastic opener to the World Cup on Day 1, South Africa conceded a late goal against Mexico. After drawing their first game, many South Africans seem disappointed, but optimistic for the remaining two fixtures in the group. Whether they have the quality to overcome the French remains to be seen, but they do have the backing of their whole nation. On the pitch, they appear to be fired up, but still culperable to the odd error; South Africa were never likely to go all the way, but could cause an upset against the French, or even a badly-coached Argentina in the last 16.

Argentina
Argentina kicked off their World Cup with a 1-0 win against Nigeria, though showed signs of vulnerability, namely in right-back Jonas Gutierrez. They took the lead through full-back Gabriel Heinze and despite the attacking prowess of Higuain, Messi and Tevez, failed to capitalise on numerous chances later in the game. Although a forlorn figure of 2006's outstanding side, Argentina can never be written off, especially with the aforementioned Lionel Messi and Carlos Tevez. Perhaps Argentina are slow starters this year, but should easily make the last 16 and must fancy their chances against any of Group A. The Argentinians have the confidence to win the World Cup this year, and may enjoy being tournament underdogs, but will need to prove that this generation is a side of class, across the field.

England
Injury-riddled England take on Algeria and Slovenia in their remaining group fixtures and are expected to make the knockout round, though must be praying not to face penalties once they qualify. Should they top their group, they'll most likely face a tie with Ghana, and a quarter final clash with France could be on the cards after that. It's difficult to say whether this is their best shot since 1966, such is the casualty list of the side. The draw's been kind to the English though, who need to keep their nerve, and build on confidence.

Germany
One game down, Germany have been easily the most impressive of any team in the tournament. Like many others, the Germans are in transition: Michael Ballack for one's not at this tournament, replaced by the younger generation coming through. After an impressive 4-0 win over Australia, the Germans must be looking to the next round, where they'll play either USA or England, and will be favourites against either. Futher than that, Argentina potentially await them in the last 8. Germany must be dark horses now, as they look to be the only team in form in the competition, but once they face stronger opposition than Australia, then the world will see just how good this crop of players are.

The Netherlands
Holland are another team slow out of the starting blocks this summer. After a scrappy win over a defensive Denmark side, the Dutch are still in a strong position to finish top of Group E, where a pairing with Paraguay is probable. Opponents after that could be Portugal or Spain, so it's important that Holland build on their opening win and start playing with the famous Dutch flair of the past. They certainly have the players to do it, but Wesley Sneijder needs to work on his partnership with Rafael van der Vaart, Robin van Persie needs to find his scoring boots, and the Dutch currently lack width, with Arjen Robben sidelined. It's a big ask for The Oranje to ditch their tag of "the greatest side never to win the World Cup", but with rising stars Ibrahim Affelay and Eljero Elia, plus the fact that the likes of van Persie and Sneijder could be at their peak in four years time, it looks like this Dutch side could be too young this time around.

Italy
A nervy 1-1 draw saw the holders kick off their campaign in a fashion unfamiliar to the Italians; defensive errors, trailing at half time, and lacking the passing ability that unlocked the world's defences in Germany '06. Italy are still strong favourites to advance the group stage, where their route to the final could be via Japan, Portugal or Spain and Argentina or Germany: opposition signicantly more difficult than Australia, Ukraine and Germany in 2006. With Alberto Gilardino up front, the Italians aren't at their sharpest, and Claudio Marchisio's service up to him isn't as potent as Andrea Pirlo's. Like so many other nations at this World Cup, The Azzurri look shadows of their former selves, though with Rino Gattuso, Antonio Di Natale, Mauro Camoranesi and Pirlo himself at the disposal of highly experienced Marcelo Lippi, it could be foolish to rule Italy out from retaining their crown.

Brazil
A workman-like, efficient Brazilian side managed a 2-1 win over North Korea just yesterday, albeit without the Samba magic the world has come to know and love from them. Without the Peles, Ronaldos and Rivaldos of the past, the Brazilian side's focal point is the lesser-known Sevilla hitman Luis Fabiano. Whether he can emulate the legendary Brazilian strikers of the past is unclear at this point in the competition, but with service from Robinho, Kaka and Elano, he stands as good a chance as any frontman in South Africa. A potential clash with Spain in the next round may excite neutrals, though Brazil are the favourites overall to clinch a sixth triumph on yet another continent: they just need one player from the squad and become a superstar.

Portugal
A Portugal side, captained by Cristiano Ronaldo, returned to the World Cup with a 0-0 draw against Ivory Coast in the "group of death", Group G. Favourites to finish behind Brazil, the obvious Portuguese strength is the enigmatic Ronaldo, who will be looking not only to supply Liédson, but to chip in with his fair share of goals. But the team needs to prove that they're as strong across the pitch; familiar Premier League names Pedro Mendes, Deco and Ricardo Carvalho should feature for Portugal. With Spain, Italy and Argentina on the horizon, it won't be easy for the Portuguese, but a strong performance against Brazil would work wonders for confidence and send out a clear message that they're a force to be reckoned with.

Spain
The only big-name nation to lose their opening game, Euro 2008 winners Spain are facing the prospect of qualifying second in their group and meeting Brazil in the knockout stages. Should they win their group, they still have the unenviable task of Portugal, but do the Spanish still have what it takes to break a habit of a lifetime and advance to last four even? If they are to reach the expectations of many, Fernando Torres has to find his match fitness quickly, David Villa needs to start scoring and the service from trio Xavi, Andres Iniesta and Xabi Alonso needs to improve on what was a lacklustre display from the midfield in Durban. One could argue that Spain need another dimension; along with the aforementioned midfield, the Spanish impact players are winger Jesus Navas and Barca-bound Cesc Fabregas, more passers. One thing is certain: Spain need to lift their game dramatically if they're going to live up to their 4-1 odds and change history.

World Cup Day 5 Review

Another day, another slew of shit coming straight from the world stage. The day started with New Zealand vs Slovakia. Neither team are expected to win the tournament, and they used that expectation to produce the tournaments fifth draw in as many days. Slovakia started the more likely to produce a goal, and did after 50 minutes of BORING BORING FOOTBALL. Vittek the goalscorer. After half an hour of more shit stain football, New Zealand found an equalizer with virtually the last kick of the game, thanks to Reid. Suffice to say, I was npt impressed by this matchup.

What followed was perhaps the best example of how not to play football kicked off at 3.00 pm GMT. The Ivory Coast took on Portugal in a clash of the titans, west Europe meets west Africa duel to the death. Former world player of the year Cristiano Ronaldo struck the post within 10 minutes, and then came the rain. Nobody shot, nobody tried. It was rather terrible, to be honest. Didier Drogba came of in the second half, to the sound of "a true African hero" courtesy of ITV's everyman cunt Peter Drury. Drogba didn't do anything, and the ref called for the end of the game 30 seconds early. What a doll.

The last match of the day was surprisingly refreshing. Unknown superpowers Brazil took on North Korea, a side that has been flown from a country that requires you to cry when the national anthem is played. The Koreans did very, very well for about 50 minutes, before some "Brazilian magic" led to the first goal of the match, thanks for Maicon. The Brazilians managed to carve their way through the Korea, and former Manchester City player Elano finished after 72 minutes. Game over? Well, no.
Korea knew anything less than a win would equal death apon their families, so they played some great, great football, and they were rewarded when Ji Yun-Nam carved the Brazilian defence apart. They were unfortunate not to score again.

Day five brought nothing new to the current trend of bad football, but at least we had some form of excitment. And we have North Korea to thank for that. Lets hope somthing new happens on day 6.

Tuesday 15 June 2010

Asian Report By Nathan Sinclair

Asian Report with your Host…..

Nathan ‘

영국의

Sinclair

Now after I looked in depth at my family history I found out I have nothing to do with Asia at all. Well I have family that live in Australia but that don’t count apparently according to Willoughby.

Now I am going to look at the world cup through the eyes of someone from Asia. So that is four teams. Australia, Japan, South Korea and the legends themselves North Korea. Each team so far has played in the cup with only half the sides winning. I will give you now a little depth of the each side and how they played so far.

First up Australia….

Now they had a really good show in qualifying. They jumped into the Asia grouping after they moved from the Oceania groupings and by god they did well. They only let in one goal the whole time and were unbeaten the whole way through their group. So to me that is very impressive. Yet it came to their first match in group D against Germany and all the goals that were never to be in qualifying. Got them all in one with a shocking 4-0 defeat which I feel they completely deserve it. It was a poor show and Cahill got sent off yes for something silly but it could have been dangerous.

Second Japan…

Now they have never won a game outside of their home country of well Japan. Now in their qualifying group they finished as the runner up to the group and showed a good show throughout. Then it came to the finals. What would they do? Fail all the games? No score a goal? Or actually win a game away from Japan? Well you would of never guessed it but….. THEY DID IT!! JAPAN WON A GAME OUTSIDE OF JAPAN!!! Same it wasn’t a very good match and they beat their group E ’friends’ and a team I thought were Africa’s best team, Cameroon 1-0.

Thirdly South Korea…

Now they did well. They finished top of their group with 16 points. Just behind their political and well overall rivals North Korea. Can you picture them games? I know I can. But anyway, once they had qualified they went into the hat and came out in group B with Argentina, Greece and Nigeria. Their first game was against opponents that had won the European Championship and were now facing something huge. No not the economic crash but the up keep of Argentina and how they would win. But anyway that’s a different story. It came to the match and they WON! 2-0 against Greece. I bet that helped the depression.

Forth and finally our loving, open friends, NORTH KOREA….

Now they finished second in their grouping. They came from know where and shocked the world. Now I heard that during the matches no one cheered from North Korea and scary as it sounds at a football match I can actually picture it. As Korea DPR now step up to the plate for the big time from no where could they do it? Would they do well in the group of Death? In group G they had five time champions Brazil, a Portugal side that have the worlds most expensive player and the Ivory Coast who people were saying after Cameroons defeat were the best African team since sliced bread. Yet how did they do? Well for a start they made sure that Brazil didn’t score a single goal for 55 minutes and then they kept it like that until Elano scored in the 72nd. Until a piece of magic happened. NORTH KOREA SCORED A FANTASIC GOALS! A player I have never hear of Ji scored on the 89th minute which I thought was the best goal of the night. Next up in the group of now so called ’Death.’ Bring on Portugal and how badly North Korea in this bloggers opinion will score. Will it be 2-1 Korea? 1-0 Korea? I certainly hope so.

This is your Asia blogger Nathan Sinclair signing out. As they say in Korea

안녕히 주무세요

or so they say.

Monday 14 June 2010

The blog; an update

as you may be aware, my posts of late have been slightly lacklusture. I've decided that I cannot single handedly do match reports on every single game. So I have three options. Either I only report on England games, everyone chips in with reports, or I do reports per day.

I'll leave it up to you...

Second podcast

Heres the second podcast streamed straight off the blog. ready to download off of itunes soon.


Don't mention the score...

Another day of World Cup 2010, and another big name on the biggest stage of all. 2006 hosts Germany returned to the World Cup with an emphatic 4-0 drubbing of Australia, a side that many fancied as runners-up in Group D. After the first brilliant performance of this year's tournament, the question is on many German lips: are Die Mannschaft good enough to go all the way?

Despite German football's illustrious past successes, history would suggest that Germany aren't destined to be champions this time around. They've not yet won the tournament as a unified nation, and Diego Maradona and Argentina's 1986 Mexico triumph aside, Brazil are the only side to win the tournament on another continent. After lifting the trophy in North America's and Asia's first hostings in 1994 and 2002 respectively, another eight years later, Brazil should be favourites to win the first African World Cup.

However if you are to believe reports, qualifying and warm-up games, Brazil's 2010 side lack flair and Maradona is one of the most incompetent coaches to manage Argentina, as demonstrated perhaps by their inability to crank up to fifth gear in Saturday's 1-0 bore against Nigeria. This is without mentioning the fact that hotly-tipped Spain have never got past the last eight, France are looking lacklustre, the African sides just aren't strong enough and if England aren't plagued by injury, the expectation of the whole country weighs the team down.

As shown yesterday, Germany have a profilic goalscorer in Miroslav Klose, already proven at two World Cups, a supporting striker who can supply or unleash a ferocious shot in Lukas Podolski, two decent playmakers in Bastian Schweinsteiger and Mesut Ozil, and top quality young players coming through, Sami Khedira, Thomas Muller and Manuel Neuer alongside the established names of Klose, Phillipp Lahm and Arne Friedrich.

Germany are certainly making a case for changing history, and this side seems to be just as strong, if not stronger than 2006's and 2002's. Whether 21st Century Germany's famous creaky defence will hold up against potent opposition is yet to be seen; though the young Germans have certainly shown so far however attack can be the best form of defence. Only time will tell whether the famous gold trophy will be heading back to Germany this summer...

Sunday 13 June 2010

England 1-1 USA

David Cameron was held responsible for Englands failure to beat the Yanks today, after it was revealed Fabio Capello had asked to borrow his crazy ideas machine, and the bugger had no batteries in it.
England went 1-0 up after 4 minutes, when brick shithouse Emile Heskey slid a pass into naughty rascal Steven Gerrard, who placed the ball past the american goal tender Tim Howard. Capello was fuming, as this clearly wasn't a crazy idea. In fact early goals had been scored all day. Capello's fears were justified when Landon Donavon passed the ball to "Englands number 6" Robert Green, who picked the ball up, juggled it for a little bit and threw it in his net. This was one crazy idea Capello wanted to forget.

After a team building exercise at half time (beat the shit out of Robert Green), England knew they needed to score. This was echoed by commentater Clive Tyldesley, who claimed "a goal will help". Unfortunatly, the goal naver came, despite long periods of domination. Heskey came close, before remembering he's shit, and shot at the goal tender, rather than at the "goalnet area". A hopeful ball into an uncharacteristicly crap Wayne Rooney wasn't met by the head that has carried Manchester United for pretty much the whole season as anticipated.
A last minute cameo appearence by Manchester United starlet Own Goal was in vein, and the match ended with the vuvuzelas drowned out by boos from that Portsmouth fan with the tatoos.

So, 1-1. There is much to take from this match however. Like Shaun Wright-Phillips should never play football again. And Emile Heskey should spend a few more hours in shooting practice.

England face Algeria next friday. Lets hope they win that, eh?

Argentina 1-0 Nigeria

World Cup scally wags Argentina put on a thrilling performance for all of 10 minutes against a peppy looking Nigeria side.
For the most part, some guy called Lionel Messi, whoever he is, bossed play about for the most part of the first ten, with little more than 77 shots in that space of time. One of those shots was wonderfully saved, and pushed out for a corner. 152 year old midfielder Juan Sebastian Veron played a beautiful cross onto the head of Gabriel Heinze, who duefully powered the header home. And that, for the first half at least, was that.
Argentina shut up shop early, and Nigeria didn't really know the rules. You felt sorry for the Africans, who passed the ball about willy nilly, without any consideration for how to score.

After the half time, Nigeria came straight out and attacked. Clearly they'd read the rules, or watched some highlights involving South Korea, because they started to shoot. The shots weren't on target, but you knew they were giving it their all.
And God bless 'em, they tried to play excitingly. Thats more than we can say for Argentina. They were boring.

The whistle blew, and pirate captain look-a-like Diego Maradona hopped off the port bow, and took a swig from his bottle of rum that he had attached to his belt, before making Messi walk the plank.

At the end of all this, a star has been born. Lionel Messi hasn't recieved any praise this season. But if he can come out of the unknown like that, then I cannot wait to see who Serbia produce.

So, how's football coverage on "The Brighter Side" of television?

At the time of writing, ITV have already hosted the opening game of World Cup 2010 and the opening England game. Now, the Great British public are eagerly anticipating ITV's next big game between Germany and Australia, two nations close to many English hearts. The first three big games in a row have all gone to the channel, who for the past couple of years have been boasting FA Cup rights and all England home games, not to mention their customary share of Champions League games with Sky. So three days in, how's it all going for them?

In the run up to South Africa, ITV have understandably been trying to alert us all that there's a bit of footie on this summer, as well as crowbarring in the names of tournaments, teams and players already being shown on Channel 3. All this information has come in the form of an advert with the slogan "We Are Football United". As if an amoeba-brained employee of the station has computer generated the phrase from the words "inspire", "football" and "team", it's perhaps the worst slogan of any television company since BBC's Frank The Friday Fish, advertising the BBC1 Friday comedy lineup a few years back.

Still, never judge a book by it's cover and all that. Who have ITV got in to present this time? The famous footballing mind himself, Adrian Chiles. After being offered a deal rumoured to be in the millions, Chiles packed what little charisma, wit and football knowledge he had in a bag and left the BBC for "The Brighter Side", as ITV claim in yet another cliched, over-metaphorical advert. And if it wasn't for the fact that Chiles was competing with the Beeb's Gary Linekar - fans' favourite as a profilic England goalscorer and the most recognizable sports presenter on British television - Chiles might just be able to pull off a few West Brom anecdotes and get away with the fact he has the charm of a yogurt.

The pundits are better, maybe? Hmm. This time around, ITV have faithfully reinvested in football legend(?) Andy Townsend, Mr. Interesting himself, Gareth Southgate and former England boss, Kevin Keegan who once banged on about Liverpool "thinking two plus two is four with their strikers... really it could equal three, or maybe even five" and came out with the classic "well, some people would call that typical City, which really annoys me. But then that's just typical City". ITV must be hoping that the former Newcastle boss doesn't talk too much rubbish for the next few weeks, but after his relapse yesterday of Messi "not producing in an Argentinia shirt", it could be squeaky bum time for bosses.

It's no wonder Eon relinquished their sponsorship of the FA Cup. Do yourself a favour, and watch the final on BBC.

Saturday 12 June 2010

South Korea 2-0 Greece

South Korea were the unlikely heroes of the 2010 FIFA World Cup, as they chalked up the first win of the tournament.
The Asian underdogs, brought to public attention when they hosted, rigged and starred in the 2002 world cup, played the attacking style of football they've been known to play for 8 years. Two goals meant the downfall of the 2004 European Champions, Greece.

Household name Lee Jung-Soo opened proceedings in Port Elizabeth with an emphatic strike after 7 minutes. Once that goal went in, the Greek masterplan of "play for 3 points over the group stage" had taken a massive blow. With only known striker Samaras with any substantial competetive experience in the Greek side, there was little substance, little style. Sorry Greece, you can't pass the ball around for 10 minutes without shooting, and expect to win. Thats not how football works.

After half time, Korea went on the rampage again, with at least 3 shots before Manchester United hero Park Ji-Sung slotted home after 52 minutes. 2-0, end of the games. Greece did very, very little to prove any points, answer any critics.

The whistle blew, and the Greeks were finally allowed to leave. They were shit. But at least theres finally a win in this tournament, and hey, South Korea made it exciting, didn't they?

Has France's Golden Generation made way for second-rate replacements?

As a Gooner, France has always been a country close to my heart, football-wise. The cheese-eating surrender monkeys have managed to produce fantastic talent, time and time again throughout my lifetime particulary. Before this year's tournament began, they were easily and understandably the favourites to progress from Group A.

I'm someone who lost patience with England a long time ago. Since then, I've been (often naively) relying on teams such as Holland, Germany, Spain, Brazil and France particulary to play fantastic football that I can watch and enjoy. But just 90 minutes into their campaign, and I'm beginning to doubt the French. They've failed to disappoint on many an occaision; the last World Cup springs to mind, where they beat Brazil amongst others, galvanized a team around the incredible Zidane and unjustly and narrowly missed out on penalties to a rude and defensive Italian side in the final.

It took only a glance across the pitch yesterday to sum up France v2010 for me. No man-mountain like Vieira, no barnstormer like Henry, no wizard like Zidane, no finisher like Trezeguet even, no rock like Thuram, no passer like Petit, no creator like Pires, no cornerstone like Makelele. Instead, Abou Diaby: a man that's only just good enough to get into the Arsenal side, a side that are a shadow of their former players. Nicholas Anelka: Great finisher but getting on now, not to mention the fact he can be as moody as Berbatov, are top class defence's going to be quaking in their boots? Sidney Govou: hasn't hit the back of the net months at international level, and last hit a newspaper back page with his dealings with child prostitutes.

Sure, there was the mercurial Ribery. Sure, they had Malouda and Henry on the bench. Sure, a team is more than the sum of it's parts; ask Mexico, South Africa even. And credit where credit's due, Abou Diaby had a brilliant game in the centre of the park. The point I'm making though is that France had an exceptional decade or so. Zinedine Zidane will be remembered as one of the globe's greatest ever players, Thierry Henry will be remembered by English football fans as one of the most naturally gifted and entertaining footballers to grace our shores, and I'm sure all Irishmen will agree.

In a space of eight years (excluding some bizarre, Far-east woes), the French lifted the World Cup, reached the final again and became champions of Europe. But those days seem to be well and truly over. I hate to write off a team as early as one game in, but unless Anelka, Gallas, Gourcuff, Ribery and co can pick themselves up, find strength from somewhere and emulate the heroes of the past generation, Les Bleus will be on the first plane back to Paris.

Friday 11 June 2010

France 0-0 Uruguay

Sales of rope hit an all time high this evening as France managed to bore a 10 man Uruguay to perhaps the most pointless point in the history of the world cup.

Highlights of the first half include a pass from Toulalan to Gourcuff, a free kick swerved in by Gourcuff, and narrowly punched over by the Uruguan 'keeper, and maybe there was a shot by Uruguay in there somewhere? I don't know. I'm not going to lie, this first half was atroucious. It really was. Passes were stray, shots were rash, and eyes were wet with tears through boredom. **Sigh.

The second half was worse than the first. The one standout highlight was a shot by Gourcuff that spun out for a throw in. Oh, and there was a red card, but I can't remember who was sent off. Boring stuff.

At the end of the day, you can't have exciting matches everyday. It's a shame that the worst game of the tournament, and it will be the worst game of the tournament, had to come so early on. Bloody French.

South Africa 1-1 Mexico

Commentators everywhere exausted the old favourite "My Big Book Of Cliches" today, as World Cup hosts, underdogs, laughing stock and heartwarmers South Africa earned a vital point in what can only be described as a victory for world cup football.
South Africa, participating in only their third world cup competition, fielded a decent side considering their stature, whilst Mexico chose an unnamed side to the one that played England many moons back.
The match started in belated fashion, with FIFA president Sepp Blatter addressing each and every fan in the stadium, by calling them "friend", before doing his best "Inbetweeners" impression. Then the game began.
Mexico took the early initiative, pushing bafana bafana back throughout the first half, though chances were few and far between. Former West Ham starlet Franco missed a sitter, and Tottenham Hotspurs "player" Giovanni Dos Santos bossed play for nigh on 30 minutes, before a solid chance was made by the Mexicans.
A corner swung in, and met by the boot of Carlos Vela, and in the back of the net. Yet he was offside, dispite Pinaar being on the far post. I thought the offside rule was easy, but that blew my mind.
The last two minutes saw a frenzy of chances squandered by South Africa, and then the whistle was blown. The first half of the first game of the first African world cup was over. It was alright.

The second half was a great improvement on the first. Bafana Bafana clearly re-vitalized by the half time break, began to attack and press the Mexicans, yet they held resiliant. Then, out of nowhere, a beautiful pass to Shabalaba, or somthing along those lines, struck the balloon so sweetly, and scored a wonderful goal. Peter Drury claimed it was "a goal for Africa". The ITV servers crashed as football and geography fans everywhere had to tell Drury that Africa is a continent, not a nation. He never amended his mistake.
More midfield based football led to the Mexican equalizer, against the run of play. South Africa left 11 men unmarked at the back of the box, and Marquez of Barcelona slotted home. 1-1.

To be perfectly honest with you, nothing happened after that. South Africa had another go at scoring, but nothing doing. Mphela broke free of the Mexican defence in the dying minutes, yet his effort struck the post and wide.

So the first game ended 1-1, and if the rest of the tournament is like this game we'll have a great tournament on our hands.

Games, Goals, and too many Vuvuzuela's ahead.

With the beginning of South Africa-Mexico imminent, it strikes me that neither of these teams look suited to qualify over France or Uruguay. Looking at both lineups, it seems like getting excited over Wigan and Bolton just because it's the first game and in Lancashire.

ITV, in the studio, they've pulled out all the stops, recruiting a man who can't take a penalty, a man Ron Atkinson racially abused and an Englishman who captained Ireland. Great job, picking the "unique" personalities, what is this, Big Brother?

Later on, we see France vs Uruguay, the first real opportunity at an upset. the French team have a coach about as popular as Steve Mclaren in Trafalgar square and a team that imitates previous World Cup controversies just to qualify. A team that does have a nice blend of youth and experience, but also one with no direction and no motivation it seems.

Uruguay on the other hand, have two fantastic strikers, creative midfielders and hard-as-nails defenders, which will immediately ovstruct and disturb France's silky, fluid apporach to the game.

I see a 1-1 draw for the opener and I see France scraping (and i mean scraping) a 2-1 win later on tonight.

Although i may have to watch these on mute or minimal volumee, as the incessant ringing of Satan's toys, also dubbed "Vuvuzuela's" could drive me to an early grave.

-Adam

2nd podcast Monday. Twitter @AFKAA or @WorldCupWillie1

Thursday 10 June 2010

South African World Cup team: "Stadiums no where near ready."

South African officials admitted earlier today that the stadiums to be used during the world cup are "A million miles from where we'd like to be."
With less that 24 hours before the big kick off, the construction team leaked the news that 40% of stadiums were going to have to be completed either overnight, or in the hours leading up to the event.
There were fears that the stadiums wouldn't be completed in time, and it seems as though those fears have been realised, however the team leader made the statement that; "We. the construction team, plan to pull an all nighter and drink a shit load of Red Bull.
I am completely confident we can get it done to a decent standard. I don't know how we could let our eye off the ball! We started a FIFA tournament with 64 teams, and then we got a bit bored. We sent Joseph here down to the Spar up the road, and he got in a crate of Budweiser, a few packets of Doritos and some credit. We then ordered in a Dominos. Meateors all around. We then finished the tournament, got the achievement, and started working again. Unfortunatly, when we started again, it was last friday, and we had half a stadium to build in Jo'burg, and another in Rustenburg."
World Cup Willie understands the company behind the blunder are "fully commited to completing the stadiums in time." Although we're certain the venues will be finished, we understand precautions have been put in place if they aren't complete. An unnamed source has told us that FIFA are set to announe a coalition with Pitch Invasion to offer at least some footballing action this summer. Other reports suggest that FIFA are in the midst of purchasing 32 brand new Xbox 360s, and preparing for an online tournament with the Official game of the world cup. More news at it happens.

In other news, Brazillian Coach Dunga has admitted he will be torn come this friday. In an exclusive interview with the former world cup winner, the legend stated "this friday isn't only the opening of the greatest sporting event in the world, but it is also a very special day for me.
I've been playing Mario games since the very first title, and I cannot wait for this installment in the series."
Dunga was of course talking about Super Mario Galaxy 2, the second highest rated game of all time. Though Dunga claims the release of the game will not affect his teams preperations for the World Cup.
"I've got a schedule written out at the moment that allows me to play the game for 5 hours a night, while still having time to sort out tactics and that.
Oh yeah, I'm 100% certain that, if everything goes to plan, I'll have the game finished by next wednesday, but I want to do the Green Coin Challenge as well."
We'll follow Dunga's progress daily.

Thats about it for today. Just enough time to tell you that our podcast is on iTunes now. download it, tell us what you think. Feedback is needed. It'll be funnier next time.
Follow us on twitter @WorldCupWillie, me @Willo290592, and Adam @AFKAA. The plans for a YouTube video have been put on hold until i can be bothered.

The pain in Spain, but is the hype in vain ?

The Spanish are perennial underacheivers, there's is no other way around it. Despite what Mark White will tell you (that they always acheive there world ranking), when you look at there World Cup results, Spain don't perform on the big occasion.

In the 1950 World Cup Spain raced all the way through to the semi-finals before being eliminated, skyrocketing themselves as one of the games elite. Since then the World Cup has been nothing to them except a re-inforcement of hwo they never deliver on the "grandest stage of all". Since 1950, Spain have yet to make another semi-final, and have only made 3 quarter finals ('86,'94 and '02) but have found that there are roadworks on this metaphorical path through to the final.

Players like Raul, Hierro, and Luis Enrique were supposed to lead the Spanish to the promised land, to knock off the powerhouses of Brazil, Italy,etc , however the Spanish have always came up short one way or another, whether it be a penalty shootout defeat to Belguim or Korea or just coming up short against the Italians, Spain always seem to find a way to fail at this stage.

However, in 2008, Spain fianlly acheived at international level, defeating Germany in the final of "Euro 2008" to finally put there stamp on the world of football. Since that win, the whole of Spain has been awaiting this tournament, wishing time away in a bid to finally land the coveted "World cup trophy (creative bunch at fifa)" and finally get the monkey off there back.

With the squad they currently possess, Villa, Torress, Xavi, Iniesta, Fabregas to name but a few, the pool of talent is endless, and an easy case could be made for why they are favourites. There are questions of this team though, is Toress fit ? Can there defence hold it together?

With the domestic league now arguably holding the 2 best players in the world (Messi and Ronaldo) and the best team (Barcelona) and the best mananger (Jose Mourinho), it seems as if there's never been a better time to be spanish. Now it just requires the team to hold there nerve and not reciprocate precceding teams.

-Adam

Twitter @AFKAA. The blog @WorldCupWillie1

Wednesday 9 June 2010

Cameron to Nation: "We are the Super race!"

UK Prime Minister David Cameron made a statement earlier today that "I am 100% certain that all British teams will win the world cup!"
The self proclaimed man of the people spoke to World Cup Willie in an exclusive interview, and said "I've been a football fanatic ever since the 1985 world cup in China. I remember taking the elevator down to my fathers media centre on saturday afternoon, and watching Saudi Arabia vs The Harlem Globetrotters. What a spectacle, especially when you see it in 3-d on a 14" television."
Cameron announced he would be flying a St. Georges Cross on the roof of his residency at 10 Downing Street, despite being the Prime Minister of Britain, not England. "I know controversy will arise, but I can assure the nation that I will be keeping a close eye on how Scotland, Northern Ireland, Wales and Gibralar do in this years tournment. Each nation have many talanted players, such a Gibraltan born Michael Parkinson, and I'm certain a British side will lift the Vince Lombardi Trophy this October."
Nobody wanted to correct the many mistakes Cameron made during the interview, but suffice to say we all got a few laughs out of his ignorance.

In "Injuryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy are the champions" today, Tim Cahill, Harry Kewell and Fernando Torres all returned to some form of action, be it light training or friendly matches, all three players are likely to appear in their opening games.

Thats all today, check out the podcast we put up, it's actually alright. Follow us on Twitter @WorldCupWillie1, follow me @Willo290592. A youtube video is set to debut tomorrow, if all goes well.

Til tomorrow!

U.S.A....Who are they ?

Going into Saturday's game against England, alot of, if not all the attention has been targeted England's way. Whether it be Rio's injury, Rooney's rage or Joe Cole's unemployment, there seems to be a constant neglect of the opponent in front of them: The United States of America.

The U.S, reknowned for being a perennial powerhouse in all forms of sport, heck they invented most of them, but Football (or Soccer as it's aptly named over the atlantic) has never really been embraced the way it has in Europe and South America. It's safe to say, as a collective nation, they don't care for the "Beautiful game". Now, things have been attempted to combat this pure disregard for the world's most popular sport (excluding fishing from being "sport"). Over the years, the top flight in U.S "Soccer" now the MLS has brought over superstars of world football to try to boost the games popularity (Pele, Beckham and now Thierrey Henry), all so far seem to get it a segment on sportscenter for a couple of days then it will fade back to being the middle child who gets ignored for the new born baby.

If the game is going to evolve in the U.S, it needs a national team that consistently be successful at the highest level, something whoch hasn't happened thus far. We've seen this team capitualte at Copa America, and previous World Cups, but we saw the spirited and brave runners-up they secured at last years Confedorations Cup (or the Marc-Vivien Foe Memorial Cup, thats what it should be) beating Spain and narrowly losing to Brazil in the final. For a few weeks this really had the 50 states talking, discussing who was better Clint Dempsey or Jozy Altidore and much more "Soccer talk". However this all died when the NFL and NBA seasons began and "there" sports season was in full swing.

Expectations from optmists is that America can make the quarter-finals, to do this, they will need to beat England or Germany realistically, something the former, something Altidore thinks they will, "3-0". If this team is to be successful he'll need to score the goals, alongside Dempsey and the evervesscant Landon Donovan. Defensively they will be reliant on Watford star JayDeMerit and ex-Fulham left back Carlos Bocanegra to help keep a tight defensive line.

With experience in abundance, the opportunity for the U.S to evolve and become elite is there, they just need to be ready to work for it. We'll see what there made of Saturday night in Rustenberg.

-Adam

Follow me on Twitter @AFKAA or the blog @WorldCupWillie1

First podcast

haven't a clue how to whack an RSS feed or whatever in this. Maybe Thom could shove some pointers my way. This is what Me and Adam did earlier.

Tuesday 8 June 2010

Rocky Rocky England

Some of you may have noticed, England is not playing like a winning team. The performances in the friendly’s have been shoddy at best, and at this moment in time the reason for the clean winning streak is playing teams that are either

A) Supposed to be inferior
B) Have some outstandingly good own goal scorers.

Now, the world cup starts on Friday, with England playing their first game on Saturday, and I will be honest, even with strong patriotic tendencies, I cannot see England making it very far. Capello seems to be unable to come out with a squad he likes, making up to 8 subs in the most recent game. I cannot begin to guess at what is going on behind that steel jaw. Some people like to claim that if the team plays this poorly and wins, then when they play well they must be fantastic, to which I would reply “when will that be then?”. With Jermaine Defoe blurting on about altitude sickness, and Wayne Rooney slowly turning a beautiful shade of red each game, I have having trouble believing.
With the massive changes and turning the team this way and that, no-one can be sure how Capello is going to tackle Saturday’s game. This is the first game he MUST win, and cannot change all 11 players on at half time, and the starting lineup will certainly be interesting to see, as it will give us a solid team we know Capello is ready to start with. The USA is also a good team, with a solid line up, so not only will the names on that start up sheet be interesting, but also how they perform together and as a team will be interesting to study. Will he bring forward a shocker? Will he bring forward a predictable team? Will he surprise us all by playing a completely new and unheard of strategy? Or will he play the good ol’ 4-4-2? Many questions will be answered this Saturday, and depending on how Capello plays it, he could leave us with many more.
Overall, I am personally doubtful as to England’s potential to win this world cup. Alas, my view is quite obviously not shared with the country, as flags fly proud. I guess within football nothing is certain, and despite my skepticism I will still watch with fingers crosses. I do not like to be proven wrong, but I will allow room in this case.


As always, you can follow us on Twitter @WorldCupWillie1, or feel free to comment below, agree or disagree? I would like to here about it. Podcast soon.

Cya

Ferdinand: "Rooney's not angry. You won't like him when he's angry."

Injured England captain Rio Ferdinand has silenced claims that striking super giant Wayne Rooney won't be able to hide is alter ego by saying "You haven't seen his other half."
Ferdinand, who has just about played 3 games for arrogant superpowers Manchester United, told World Cup Willie: "In the last year or so, Rooney has done everything he can to conceal his secret identity.
Ever since that red card against Fulham last leason, he's been to anger managment classes and has laid off the gamma radiation alot. I think it's safe to say, there is no way the monster inside Wayne will escape in South Africa."
But what is this monster? After extensive research, Willie can reveal that wayne Rooney is in fact the Incredible Hulk. This shocking revalation will surprise many, but former Manchester united captain Roy Keane made this statement in his latest Ipswich Town press conference: "I don't care! He's the Hulk! So what?!? Get on with it! I don't like him as a player, I don't like him as a father, and I don't like him as a person. He can shove his alter ego up his bollocks.
I was the Hulk once. Do you see me drawing attention to myself every five minutes? No. Now get out before I get mad."
More on Rooney's anger in the near future.

In todays installment of "The Injury Files"; Manchester United winger Luiz Nani has been ruled out of the world cup and the forthcoming world championships of the pool, after a freak diving accident.
Nani, 23, was said to be "training hard for both competitions, and he got the two sports mixed up again. He dived head first into the ground, and broke his collar bone. This biggest travesty was the 4.5 rating Carlos Quiroz gave him. It was at least a 7."
England midfielder Gareth Barry has been ruled out of Englands opening game against the USA, and David James is a major doubt, after Fabio Capello realised there are better players than them. Team news is expected to leak to us early saturday.

Thats all for today. Read Adams post, it's good, follow us on twitter at WorldCupWillie1, and there will be a podcast up by the end of the week. I'll be back.

Is it Nether going to be there land ?

As the old cliche goes, there's never been a more prime example than the Netherlands, the term "always the bridesmaid, never the bride", not only is a reference to Jennifer Aniston's love life, but also the results the Holland national team have earnt at world cups over the years.

Unlike most other teams who have failed to lift the world cup, the strange part of this puzzle is that Holland are always a major force at World Cup's. During the 1970's, Holland incorporated a style that was christened as "total football", with talisman Johann Cryuff (Dad of former Man Utd great Jordi) doing things with a football people didn't think were possible. During the '74 tournament he performed a marvellous bit of skillthat was then named after him: "The Cryuff turn".

It's often seen as one of football's greatest tragedies Holland not winning a world cup during this "total football" era, this team were reknowned for re-creating the beautiful game, and a re a key inspiration for teams (Arsenal, Barcelona) who replicate this style.

During the 1980's, the Dutch didn't fare well in the two tournaments ('82 and '86), and in fact didn't make the smi finals again until France '98, where all time record goalscorer Patrick Kluivert and former Arsenal legend Dennis Bergkamp created one of the most deadly partnerships in world cup history. In this tournamnet they finished 4th, which meant the wait continued for another 4 years.

In qualification for the 2002 world cup, Holland were dealt a huge blow, conceding late in Dublin to a Jason McAteer (that scouser who plays for Ireland) screamer, meaning they finished 3rd in the group and Korea and Japan missed on the picture-esque sea of Orange which arguably makes the world cup a better experience, and definatley a mor ecolourful one.

The Dutch fans are the most positive fans to grace world football, no matter what team, or score, they're always louder, more passionate and obviously more visible than their counterparts. If ever their was a set of supporters who deserved a world cup, it was the Dutch.

Despite there "failings" in the world cup, Holland have tasted success, winning the 1988 european championships beating the USSR in the final to finally taste success as a nation, however the european championships is the Prince of the sport, and the Dutch will not be satisfied until they've conquered the King.

-Adam

p.s If all holds well, the debut podcast should be released by the end of the week.

Follow me on twitter @AFKAA or the blog @WorldCupWillie1.

Monday 7 June 2010

Set course to pointlessness.

England faced a clearly understrength Platinum Stars FC in a final warm up friendly earlier today, and won 3-0. The usually top notch South African giants played a poor game. Jermain Defoe slotted home inside 5 minutes, leaving Platinum Stars in the dust. Englands game plan had unsettled the world reknowned Gods of African football. A chance of an instant reply was scuppered, as the Stars blasted a penalty over the bar. Joe Hart, chosen over Goalkeeping rivals Robert Green and David James, had little to do in the 45 minutes he played. As the first half drew to a close, a barrage of broken Vuvuzelas flew onto the pitch at the Stars players. The fans were visibly disappointed with the standard of football.
A new half, a new team. No little that 8 substitutions from King Capello, including the arrival of Wayne Rooney and the debut of Michael Dawson, saw England galvanize themselves and pin the Stars back. A wonderfully woven attack, starting with Wazza, saw Joe Cole find the net. Tens of mundane minutes later, Rooney found the net from 20 yards out. 3-0, good night South Africa.
What can we take from this very, very, very important match? Well, an indication of the team that will start against the U.S.A on Saturday. Joe Cole played the entire game, which indicates a start for him, and Joe Hart started, making him the only goalkeeper to play in all 3 of Englands warm up friendlys. That, however, is just an observation. If Iwere the England manager, this is who would start on Saturday: Hart, Johnson, King, Terry, Ashley Cole, Milner, Gerrard, Lampard, Joe Cole, Rooney, Defoe.

In todays installment on "injury watch", good news all round, to be honest. Upson and King both started, Drogba claims his arm surgery was a success, Altidore is back in training and Robben's set to make the world cup. That seems to be it.

Thats all for today. Slow day for world cup news today. The match reports will be better during the tournament. We'll take notes and that. Also, read what Adam wrote earlier. It makes you think something chronic, and it really is very good. Til tomorrow, my friends.

-Tom

Are England disappointment personified ?

With the start of the tournament less than a week away, it's time to take an in-depth look at England's chances. As an Englishman (and part-Welsh, there are split loyalties), it's always an entertaining time in the build-up to world cup, not to know whose playing, or who we're playing. The exciting part is to know what round England lose on penalites.

Since faliure to qualify for the World Cup in '94, England have gone on to lose on the "dreaded penalties" in 4 of there last 6 tournaments. The ending to a world cup campaign has become a similar pattern every world cup. A villian wgho receives a red card walking down the tunnel like a golden sillouhette, looking like a cheesy character in an old John Wayne western film. This will be followed by the emergence of a hero. The hero statusis what elevated Michael Owen from a player with bags of potential, to the player who "got that goal versus the Argies".

After the sudden surge in expectation and hope and the players offering the legions of football mad Englishman, sinking pint after pint of european lager whilst telling us how England is superior in ever department (despite that Carlsberg being from Denmark). That surge will inevitably be met with a close opportunity towards the end of the game or extra time, before the ref puts the whistle to his mouth and signals that penalties will settle the hopes and dreams of a nation (on the last couple of occasions this is when the camera pans to Phil Scolari smug expression, showing he knows what's about to happen).

At this time blind faith is what keeps us from admitting faliure and begin planning for our clubs next season and european championship qualifiers, usually a player on the opposition will miss )perhaps deliberately to put more pressure on the next failing England player to make a dick of himself from 12 yards). The players that miss the penalties don't usually receive the criticism back home unless they make an advert about it and try to cash in on out misery (i'm looking at a certain Mr.Southgate there) but unite in the collective misery of a nation whilst the ever optmistic fan will tell us "we didnt actually lose" or "we'll win it in 4 years" before his mates all tell him to shut up and sob like a baby who just had there jack in the box stolen.

In the aftermath of this, the players will face the wrath of "The Sun", but then as a nation we realise that perhaps we just aren't good enough, but obviously we will be next time. The players will come home early from the world cup much to the dismay of the fans, the despair of the players and the delight of the Germans. The flags and shirts go away for 4 years, and we all go back to our clubs and use the recycled blind fait to convince ourselves that your team "will go up this year".

However we all rejoice in the end, because at least we made it to the knockout stages and got knocked out, something Scotland could only dream of.

-Adam.

Follow me on twitter @AFKAA or the blog @worldcupwillie

Sunday 6 June 2010

The Spanish Inquisition

Spanish goalkeeper Iker Casillas has questioned Italian royalty, by suggesting Fabio Capello's goalkeeper choices aren't world class enough. Casillas suggested that all goalkeepers partaking in this years competition must have played at Champions League level. Casillas belives that only the players from the very best teams in the world should participate in the world cup, and this promotion of elitism is not really what you want. Something to consider, Iker; Valdes is your number 2, despite being the goalkeeper for arguably the best team in the world. How does that work then? Dispicable behavior.

On the injury front, which could now become a regular segment, more names can be added to the ever growing list of world cup doubts; Valon Behrami of Switzerland and Martin Skrtel of Slovakia are the big names to be hit by a violent case of "World Cup Fever", a medical condition that attacks only the big names of participating countries. Famous cases of the fever in history include Wayne Rooney in 2006, David Beckham in 2002 and Bryan Robson in 1986 and 1990. There are no doubt a slurry of other injurys, yet considering these two players play for some of the more famous clubs, West Ham United and Liverpool respectively, it seems they've grasped the limelight.

And finally, the designers of the world cup ball, titled the "Jabulani", have defended the controversial football, claiming "the air is to blame. who let you in?"
The team behind the ball told World Cup Willie "We took a conventional balloon, and tried sanding it down so it was round, and didn't have a bobble at the bottom of it. This experiment proved unsuccessful, as the balloon kept popping, despite the promises of the manufacturer. Adidas then cut our funding, so we bought a shed load of those balls you can win at school raffles and suff, you know, the ones that are essensially a balloon covered in rubber and plastic. We then covered those in paper mache, and sent in to Adidas HQ. Then it got chosen to be used at the world cup.
We thought we surpassed ourselves with this ball, but we never expected the reaction to it. When Frank Lampard says somethings wrong, you know you've done bad." The spokesperson then broke down into tears, and we left without making too much of a disturbance.

Thats all for today, follow us on twitter at WorldCupWillie1 for breaking news as it happens, and score updates during the tournament. And don't forget there will be videos on the youtube channel soon, and myself and the team are discussing the possiblity of a podcast. Some really exciting stuff is happening at the moment, and I hope you stick along for the ride.

(Most of the stuff here is real. Quotes and stuff aren't.)

Saturday 5 June 2010

England: Injury Kings. And Ferdinand. And Upson. And Jam...

Clearly the big news to come out of South Africa in the last 24 hours is that England have not only lost their captain Rio Ferdinand to injury, but also centre backs Ledley King, Mathew Upson and goalkeeper David James have picked up knocks in training. King, Upson and James missed training on saturday morning.
This comes a day after captain Rio Ferdinand failed to complete training after picking up a knee injury courtesy of an Emile Heskey challenge.
This throws Englands world cup bid into chaos. I mean, with Rio out, the captain will be Gerrard. I'm not being funny, but Terry was stripped of the captaincy for doing everything with legs. Fabio saw this act as unfitting for an England captain. Rio got it, and fair play, in the two games he was captain for, England played some of the most boring football in the history of English football, and still won. So, yeah, Stevie G's got it now. He's hardly got a sparkling past. He battered a DJ because he played "You said no" by Busted, when he specifically requested "Air Hostess". A fair act, you might say, but you forget that the DJ only owned "Now thats what I call music! 55"
Now there are rumours circulating (mainly by Me and my close personal sources(my little brother)) that Stevie got a 15 year old girl pregnant. This is our captain. A paedophile thug.
So what do these injuries mean to the England squad? It means replacing Rio will either be a broken Tottenham defender, a broken West Ham defender, an inexperienced Tottenham defender or a scouse that hasn't played competitive international football for 4 years, and only turns up for the big games. Who does he think he is, Ryan Giggs?

In other news, Carlo Ancelotti will no doubt be nursing a migraine as TWO MORE Chelsea players look set to miss the world cup. John Obi Mikel and Didier Drogba are no doubt going to miss the world cup alongside Michael Essien and Michael Ballack. There must be something in the water. Arjen Robben is also a major doubt, but its hard to care about that.

So thats todays update. Don't forget to follow us on twitter. Our username is WorldCupWillie1, and in the next few days and weeks you'll be getting live score updates and breaking news as it happens. Keep an eye on the blog as well. Never forget the blog.

I'm close to completing the team that will bring you the most unbelieveable World Cup coverage this side of the BBC.

Friday 4 June 2010

First Post (couldn't think of a humourous title)

What's up? S'pose I should give a bit of information about the context of this blog and what not. I'm Tom Willoughby, budding journalist and football enthusiast. I basically thought to myself one summers eve; "I think I'll do a world cup blog, push my name out there." This is the spawn of that dream.
Leading upto and during the world cup, I'm gonna be blogging the shit outta my laptop. I also plan to whack some match reports on my facebook, score and news updates on my twitter and daily opinion videos on a to be created youtube account. Theres a lot of shit going down with me this year, what with exams and the sheer amount of stuff i've just foolishly promised you guys, so I may need a little bit of help. This is where you come in...
My ultimate dream is to form a team of superhuman reporters, to help tackle various aspects of the world cup on all media fronts.
I want this world cup to be the best world cup ever, or at least a hell of a lot better than that piece of shit 2006 incarnation. Bored me to tears.
So, if you want to be a part of what could be a revolution in people media, drop me a comment in the secion below this post with some details or whatever, or email me at tomwilloughbyrulez@hotmail.com. If you don't, I'll be doing all this stuff on my own. And no one wants that.